‘It has taught me to embrace life more’: Jessica Cornish on her health battle, comebacks and cracking China

You can’t imagine it, the singer remarks. There she was gearing up for her comeback record in eight years, ecstatically in love with her current love, and finally the mom to a little one after struggling to conceive for a decade, feeling invincible. Suddenly in March she was told she had breast cancer.

The artist, real name J. Cornish, is famous for being brutally honest. The LP, Don’t Tease Me With a Good Time, was meant as an candid account, tackling every bit of hardship she’d faced since she last worked on songs (endometriosis, pregnancy loss, failed relationships, emotional abuse, suicide) with her usual frankness. The initial release, her single No Secrets, was launched in the spring. But by then there was a mighty secret. Her diagnosis. Later follow-up track, the upbeat Living My Best Life, was released in late spring and Cornish was giving interviews about how she was living her best life, while still secretly living with breast cancer. A month later she disclosed her condition, and in the start of summer she received surgical treatment.

She gives me her best “What the fuck?” glance. “I release with a song called the track No Secrets. I’m doing every interview, and they’re, like, ‘So what’s new with you?’ and I answer, ‘Uh, nothing really’” the singer has just had to cancel tour dates because she’s yet to undergo cosmetic procedures.

We’re at a studio in the capital. She is sporting a beige fake-leather jacket, jeans with ornate white designs, beige footwear and large glasses. Imagine biker chic meets 70s singer aesthetic. “I feel like I’m in the seventies and I should have a man with facial hair.” Like the film, I say, recalling the film. “I was nicknamed that in school!” She grins. Cornish is sharp-witted, bold and filter-free. She says she has always fancied doing comedy and is planning to attempt her initial standup show in the coming year. “I love making people laugh. When performing I frequently joke about the crowd.”

Health Struggles and Diagnosis

She was planning an slot at the ceremony when she noticed an abnormality. “I quickly sought to get it checked, had an ultrasound, and they were, like, ‘It looks like nothing; your tissue is healthy.’ And I responded, ‘Yet I sense it. I have arm pain and pins and needles in my hands whenever I wake up.’ And they replied, ‘We should biopsy it?’ That was 28 March, the post-birthday.” It was a weekend eve. The specialist told her if it was bad news she’d call on the start of the week. By then Cornish had convinced herself it was nothing. The way she explains it, it was just bad timing to face illness when she had many commitments.

“It was a fortnight prior from debuting the project after a long hiatus and an extended break. And she [the doctor] texted and said, ‘Can you talk at six?’ And I assumed, ‘It’s virtual, probably routine.’ So I log in expecting it’s all going to be good, and she goes, ‘You might want to sit.’ The solemn tone? And she reveals, ‘I’m so, so sorry but your biopsy results have come back as malignant cells.’” What was your reaction? “I replied, ‘Well, that’s not great. That’s not fucking great timing.’ My initial thought was, ‘I have to survive for my boy.’”

Some men find me challenging due to my self-awareness

She viewed the procedure terrifying and absurd. “I dislike anesthesia. They walk you down. You know when you have emergency surgery you go on a gurney, but this time I just strolled down with a hospital gown and my backside out. You feel like you’re in an episode of Black Mirror.” But, she adds, she’s been lucky. No chemo, no radiotherapy, just the surgery. “Cancer sucks, man, but you know what? Thank fuck I found it early. The surgery happened a few months back and my right breast now looks like a grapefruit under a tight bedsheet.” Another grin. “The nipple was preserved.”

The subsequent surgery is both medical and cosmetic. Her chest, she observes, are now “different sizes. The implant is larger than before. That’s impolite! I felt, no need to bully me, I’m already having a hard period. How offensive! Ironically I said I’d avoid breast surgery because I’ve got OCD, and I know they’d never be ideal. Illness changed that.”

A History of Health Challenges

Cornish is no stranger to illness. She feels her attitude toward illness has been so upbeat because she’s familiar with medical emergencies. Many times they occur alongside professional successes, functioning as a wake-up call, or punch in the stomach, to make her recall not to take anything for granted. “Honestly, I feel life goes, ‘You having a good time? Hold on.’ Since childhood, it has consistently accompanied moments of success for me; something severe or obscure has affected my well-being.”

She recalls to her 11-year-old self, already making her debut featuring in the stage in a musical (she was cast at the age of nine years old). That’s when she was told about the heart condition a syndrome, which can cause a fast heartbeat as well as lightheadedness and irregular beats. “I rehearsed between visits on an drip, and being readmitted at night.” She fast-forwards six years, and teenage Jess has entered the trio Soul Deep while attending the Brit School. “I signed my initial contract, and I had a brain incident. Then when I was planning to release songs in the year 2020 I had a automobile accident and my voice box shifted and I lost my voice for a year.”

Oi, I say, wait, I need a moment. You really had a stroke at 17? She nods|agrees